Thoughts upon traveling to Wisconsin for a wedding only to find that it is a reenactment.
The Goob and Mrs. Goob have been married.
Since April 5th.
We thought we were coming to a wedding. To see two people GET married. Turns out they already had. And they didn’t tell us because we had said we would like to see them ‘get’ married. Even though we told them we would travel to where they live in Georgia if they went to a judge. They said they didn’t tell us because her parents wouldn’t have been able to come, and that wouldn’t have been fair.
But it apparently is fair for her family to know that it happened, but not us. Her parents did guess and have known about the ‘real’ marriage for awhile. And they didn’t tell us either. NOT that it was her parents’ place to do so. But didn’t we deserve to know too? We had to buy a new fucking truck just to be able to MAKE the trip (over 1200 miles one way!!!!!). We had to rearrange my daughter’s college orientation because of this wedding. We had to get special permission for Buck to be absent from his summer school course (usually if they don’t go every day, the credit is forfeited) because of going on this trip. We’ve had to spend money on clothes and food and other travel expenses, pay for someone to take care of the animals, and all sorts of other fucking expenses for this trip.
All to see a reenactment of an event that already took place, and that we have been lied to about for two months now. And when they moved in together two months ago, and hemmed and hawed about why they couldn’t wait till they got married, I should have suspected something. But I thought maybe it was because they were living together, and felt awkward about telling us. Out of respect for their privacy, I didn’t pursue any other questions. They’re adults, right, and able to live together if they want.
But apparently the rest of our family doesn’t get the respect of the truth. Evidently, we’re supposed to see this as a vacation and enjoy it. It’s not a place I would have chosen to come for a vacation. Oh, Wisconsin has its charms, but it’s a fucking long way to come for a vacation that was ‘chosen’ for us. And now we have debt from having to by a new truck because we didn’t have time to get our previous truck fixed (it started having problems right before we left).
Fortunately, there was some money left over from BR’s Mama’s estate. Money that BR and I had hoped to use for an Alaskan cruise next summer. We’ve never had a honeymoon. And we didn’t mind spending the money for this wedding to see Goob get married. We were HAPPY to do it. The six people in our family haven’t been together in one place for over three years now, so we were thrilled to have this event to bring us together.
And now we come all this fucking way only to find that the event had already happened. And they have to know we are disappointed at being lied to. And looking over my statistics, I know one of them, at least, reads this blog.
I’m trying to calm down. It’s done, the money is spent, we should try to enjoy it as much as we can. But dammit. Apparently we’re such backward people we couldn’t have handled the truth, because ‘we wanted to see them get married’. Yes, who DOESN’T want to see a beloved child get married to the person he loves and wants to spend the rest of his life with? It’s a beautiful event to witness. But now, now that beauty has been tarnished by covering the truth.
It’s just….beyond disappointing.